Only Children

Have I mentioned that I am an only child? Not only am I an only child but I am the only child of an only child. Spoiled?? Me?? Naaaaa! Actually I wasn't spoiled with material things but I have to tell you as far as my grandparents were concerned I not only hung the moon but I also created the sun and stars and I didn't disagree with them. What?? You think I have STUPID written on my forehead? My parents divorced when I was in 1st grade and my mother went back to college to finish her teaching degree.I lived with my grandparents and for four years I only saw my mother on the weekends. That was very difficult but living with grandparents definitely had advantages. How many kids can say they never did anything wrong in four years and have witnesses to backup their story? The closest I ever came to getting into trouble was the time I set my grandfathers chair on fire and almost burned down the house. HEY...it was an accident and could have happened to anybody! My grandmother had walked to the grocery store and since I had been to the library the day before I was engrossed in a Bobbsey Twins book and elected to stay home and read. My mistake was putting the book down and deciding this would be a nifty time to play a trick on my grandma. I took a pair of my grandfathers pants, shoes and a shirt and stuffed them with newspapers to look like a person laying in the recliner. OK, "he" looked pretty real at first glance but hmmmm, what would make it more lifelike. OH....how about a lit cigarette?? It was the 50's and EVERYBODY smoked. So I placed the cigarette where the mouth would be, if my newspaper dummy had a mouth, and watched for my grandma out the front window. When she got to the end of the driveway I lit the cigarette, hid in the closet and waited to hear her scream. Well, I heard her scream all right. The dummy (the newspaper dummy not me), the chair and the living room rug were all on fire. Grandma and the neighbor managed to put the fire out before the volunteer firemen arrived but the whole house had to be repainted, chair and rug replaced,drapes washed...it was a total mess. My punishment? Couldn't tell you, I'm still waiting.