Back To Bald Head Island

I still say possession is 9/10's of the law but I did the right thing and put Sarah on the ferry so she can spend a few days with her cousins on Bald Head Island. However, that doesn't mean I didn't do a big pout. While we were at the ferry landing there was a nice breeze and the extra bonus were the dolphins swimming around the deck area. Bald Head is such a neat place and she loves being with her cousins so I know Sarah will have a great time but I wasn't ready to let her go. It was a lonely drive back to Myrtle Beach but I needed to get back for the last banquet of the weekend and honey, after the group was seated I came home and took a nap of epic proportions. Hopefully, after a good nights sleep I will be almost human again by morning. Well, let's not set our goals too high.

Loaves and Fishes

It was a beautiful morning so Sarah and I talked TommyB into going with us to the beach and while grandma spent a couple of hours in her chair playing lifeguard while the two "kids" looked for sharks teeth and rode boogie boards. TommyB found several sharks teeth for Sarah to take home but Sarah and I decided the only way we would ever find one would be if the tooth were large enough to trip over. Maybe our forte is diamond hunting. After much needed showers we boiled shrimp and played Password until time to go work. The plan was (notice the WAS) to leave work around 7 PM, make a return trip to the Mirror Maze and top the evening off with a walk on the beach and collect more shells. Yeah, right. This group showed up with 25 more people than they gave a final count for sooooo from that point forward controlled chaos was the theme of the evening. Poor Sarah was put to work counting people, seating people, rolling silverware and listening to grandma gripe. We were finally able to walk out the door at 10 PM and decided we really really needed some dinner before bed. Well...paha! There was a bad accident on the entrance ramp to Hwy 17 and we sat in traffic for almost 45 minutes. We finally inched our way into California Dreaming's parking lot at 10:45 PM (they close at 11 so you know they were thrilled to see us) and begged to be fed. Ah yes, it was a night of fine cuisine as Sarah dined on a hot dog and french fries while I had the house salad which comes with one of their to die for homemade croissant rolls. I gave Sarah my roll and she decided they were so good we really really needed to bring two home for breakfast. Not exactly what we had planned for Sarah's last night in Myrtle Beach but guess what...we had fun anyway.

Thief!

Sarah and I left work early this afternoon and went to Ocean Boulevard to check out the Mirror Maze, Motion Master and Haunted Adventure. Sarah loved the Mirror Maze and Motion Master...the Haunted Adventure, not so much. We met our friend Kim who went with us and thank goodness she did because I have a sneaking suspicion Sarah and I would still be stuck in the Haunted Adventure as about halfway through Sarah was done with that place, not taking another step...it was OVER. Kim is the manager of the Boulevard properties and very kindly showed us a way out. We didn't even care that the employees call it the CHICKEN EXIT as by that time our pride was long gone. We came home put on our bathing suits, picked up TommyB and headed to the beach to look for sharks teeth. There was a beautiful sunset, nice breeze, warm water but I swear that beach was smooth as velvet. Not a sharks tooth to be found and very few shells. It dawned on us this afternoon that Sarah has been here for several days and we have not been to Krispy Kream yet...say it isn't so??!! TommyB, Sarah and I decided we NEEDED doughnuts so on the way home we went through the drive through (yep, the HOT light was on, duh) and got a dozen for TommyB and a dozen for us. Sarah was in the backseat holding both boxes and the oddest thing happened. When we arrived home our dozen was intact but that darned Krispy Kream shorted TommyB as he only had 11 doughnuts in his box! It is so hard to get good employees these days and we plan to call the company first thing tomorrow morning.

Beach Renourishment

I would like to offer a public apology to citizens of the great state of South Carolina concerning the sudden desperate need for beach renourishment. The good news is the sand isn't really missing and can be retrieved from the floorboard of my car, entry hall and bathroom floors. While we are on the subject of beach renourishment I need to vent. I don't understand why we allow building houses, condos or hotels right smack dab on the beach. We can continue hauling sand till the cows come home but guess what...one good storm and you are right back where you started except a lot poorer and Mother Nature wins every single time. We lived oceanfront for several years and while I appreciated the rest of the state contributing to the care and upkeep of my back yard I still thought it was a total waste of tax money as the shoreline is constantly changing. Bet you can guess how popular I was with the neighbors. Ya'll have a great day, Miss Sarah and I are going to the beach and then (drum roll please) out for LOBSTER and CRAB LEGS!

It's a GIRL!

Shhhh....Polly doesn't know this yet but I am keeping Sarah. Not only is Sarah a delightful child BUT she does chores! We spent the afternoon at the beach and managed not to get sunburned which was a first for one of Polly's children. Polly we love you, really we do but when you have children who spend 10 months of the year in the great frozen north you have to e-a-s-e them into the 90+ temps and bright sunshine rather than spray them down with Pam and flip them over hourly. After showers and cool drinks Sarah and Morty played with the doll house the rest of the afternoon or maybe I should say Sarah TRIED to play with the doll house while Morty was determined to be IN the doll house, knocking over furniture, laying on the little people and generally being a pain. About 6PM we decided it was time for dinner and wouldn't you know that was the same time 100,000 tourists decided they were ready to eat too. After a brief discussion of favorites we headed to Planet Hollywood. The hostess told us there was a 90 minute wait sooooo I asked if my friend Debbie was on property. Even though Debbie had left for the day we were seated immediately... which I am sure pleased the people who were still waiting to no end. Thank you Debbie...I owe ya one! After dinner Sarah and I went back to the beach, waded in the surf, talked nonstop and watched the pink sunset reflected on the water. Perfect end to a perfect day.

A great lady was laid to rest today.

My children will vouch for my ability to hang onto favorite clothes items way past their prime. There was a kelly green sweatshirt, a particular pair of kakhi pants and OH...my white sail cloth pants all come to mind and I'm sure there were others that I have forgotten about. Well, today was a particularly sad day as Bloomie bit the dust. Yes, it's true...Bloomie is no longer with us. Bloomie was 20 years old, incredibly soft and hot pink with BLOOMINGDALES in rainbow colors blazed across my bosom. Bloomie was purchased in NYC by a former boyfriend of Eddie's and she served me well over the years. I knew Bloomie's days were numbered when I pulled her out of the washer last week and she had developed a slight hole under her left arm and yes, I did shed a tear. However, this week the "slight hole" was larger than the neck opening and that was when I knew it was finally over for Bloomie. Rest well my friend, you served me well and you will be missed.

Rainy Day

When I woke up at 6 this morning (and why why why don't I reserve that for work days??) I heard rolling thunder. My first thought was some poor tourist is listening to this too and wondering what the heck they are going to do with four kids who have been counting the days until they get to go to the beach. Then I thought...well, it sucks to be them but I LOVE rainy mornings, rolled over and went back to sleep.

Jannyland

I'm not a rainbow shooting out my butt, roses and sunshine 24/7 kinda gal but I do try to focus on the positive. It has been brought to my attention that because of this trait I must live in a mythical place called Jannyland. I don't know...maybe that is true but I do know Jannyland is a very happy place and you are welcome to come visit anytime. Just be nice or I will pinch your little head right off at the shoulders.

Coffee

I've never been a big coffee drinker until recently when I bought the best, most perfect, nearer my God to thee coffee maker. I'm not being paid to endorse this product...heck the Keurig folks don't even know I exist but honey let me tell ya, I love Love LOVE their coffee maker! I never liked making coffee at home because I usually ended up throwing most of it out and then you have the grounds to deal with and I would usually forget about the grounds until the next morning...yuk. I bought the smallest version of the Keurig which works great for me. It uses the little plastic k-cups filled with real coffee grounds so you have real brewed coffee and all you have to do is drop the k-cup in the trash and you are DONE. The Keurig makes one outstanding cup at a time, no coffee grounds or mess to deal with and I have to say it's pretty darn close to perfect. The French Roast is wonderful in the morning but I do enjoy the flavored ones in the evening. My favorites are French Vanilla, Swiss Almond Chocolate and of course Hazelnut. With all this caffine you would think I would get some work done but naaaaaaa. Hey...it's coffee not a magic wand. http://www.keurig.com/

Grandma's in Round Rock!

Every family speaks shorthand and one of our shorthand phrases is GRANDMA'S IN ROUND ROCK which is our family's way of saying, "Holy Crap...this house is a pig sty and company is on the way!" That particular saying started when we lived in Austin, TX and my parents were driving down from IN to spend a week with us. I don't know how you clean house but it seems as if I can't really really clean without making a much bigger mess first. I had planned to tackle the refrigerator and mop the kitchen floor that morning and pronounce the kitchen DONE but once I got started it was a clear case of "we need to burn this room off and build a new one or Buford bring me the bleach". The kids were working on their rooms which translates to throwing junk in the closet and shoving clean clothes in the hamper because that is easier than putting them away...DUH! So I put on my big girl panties, stopped whining and started on the kitchen. The curtains were in the washer, the silverware drawer was clean and straight and don't even try to tell me you don't get those little crusty, crumby, boogery things in your silverware drawer because I know better. The refrigerator was next on the list but first I completely emptied every cabinet with the idea that I would have no choice but to wash the cabinets and reorganize. What the hey...the parental units were not arriving for at least another 24 hrs and I had all the time in the world. It was right about then our phone rang. Eddie answered and I heard her say, "Grandma you are almost here...just turn right when you get to Round Rock." And that my friends is how our families saying of GRANDMA'S IN ROUND ROCK so get up off your butt and start cleaning something, anything NOW phrase was born and continues to this day.

Tanning

I have very fair skin and am very close to being translucent. For years I had a real love affair going with the sun and I do think fat definitely looks better brown than white. The liver spots on my hands....ummm, not so much. So for the past few years I've stayed out of the sun but have tried several self tanning products with varying degrees of success and much entertainment. When you live by yourself how the heck to you get your back? I've tried several techniques which have all failed miserably and I hate to think I have to get married just to have a tan back. Then I tried a salon spray tan which was very much like taking a 1965 Buick to Maaco or Earl Scheib for a new paint job. Nothing humbles an old fat lady quite like standing almost nekid (I was wearing nothing but ragged underwear and a shower cap) in front of a 20 yr old potential centerfold while she sprayed me down with brown goo from what appeared to be an old weed killer spray pump can. After that process I was directed to another room with fans and had to stand with my feet apart and arms over my head (still wearing the shower cap) to allow the "product" to dry properly. Geesh...I finally collected what little dignity I had left and ran screaming to my car. That was several years ago and I understand they now have private booths with nozzles so I may give the spray tan another try but probably not. Just plan to wear sunglasses this summer so the glare from my white legs won't make you snow blind.

Time Travel

Do you believe in time travel? I do as anytime I smell burning leaves I am right back in the 8th grade and the sky is that impossible deep blue that you only see in the fall. Anny and I are raking leaves which will be followed by a big night of Monopoly, Chef Boy R Dee pizza and the drink of choice is RC Cola. Oh yeah, big time Saturday night in Kingman, IN circa 1963. Of course burning leaves is not exactly PC these days and while I really do sympathize with people who have allergies and I know it's not good for the environment BUT... I miss the smell of leaf smoke. Weenie roasts and hayrides...do kids get to do that anymore? We always used apple wood for the fire and I still love the smell of a wood fire but I'm starting to sound like a bit of a pyromaniac. There are other smells (not fire related, I promise!) that take me back too... bacon and coffee remind me of my Grandma as well as Pledge. I swear that woman Pledged anything that stood still. Time travel? Oh yeah, I am a believer.

HUH?

I'm sitting here minding my own business, paying a few bills, ignoring a few bills and have TV Land on in the background just for the company. In a court of law I would swear June Cleaver just said, "Thank you Ward, now I have to go pee on the hard boiled eggs." However, based on my past history with June I feel certain she actually said, "Thank you Ward, now I have to go PEEL the hard boiled eggs." The point I am trying to make is, how many other things am I hearing wrong. This has been happening to me for years. Remember Creedance Clearwater Revival? One of my favorite songs is Bad Moon Rising and I thought the lyrics were THERE'S A BATHROOM ON THE RIGHT when the actual words are THERE'S A BAD MOON ON THE RISE. It never occurred to me that my words made no sense, well actually my words do make sense but it never occurred to me that my words were wrong. OH...and it took me years to figure out that Abba wasn't singing IF YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND (Jackie Chan) I'M THE FIRST IN LINE (Jackie Chan). Well, actually they were singing MOST of those words except where I was singing Jackie Chan Abba was singing TAKE A CHANCE. I have a doctors appointment next week and I hope he speaks loudly and clearly when he says, "I want to listen to your heart." Otherwise he could be in for a real surprise.