January is supposed to be slow.

What the heck happened? The phone is ringing off the hook, people getting married, business seminars, the Presidential debates and don't even get me started on the Red Hatters. Apparently these people did not read the rules before entering JANNY LAND and the rules very clearly state THOU SHALL NOT MAKE JAN WORK DURING THE MONTH OF JANUARY BECAUSE WE DARN NEAR KILLED HER DURING THE MONTH OF DECEMBER . Lord knows I don't ask for much (we all know that is a big lie but just ignore it) and I really don't think it's asking too much to be allowed to veg quietly in my cubette (it's a cubette because it's too small to be called a cube) and totally ignore January. You will have to excuse me now....think I feel a big pout coming on.

Bimini's Oyster Bar

Steamed oysters on Sunday nights has become somewhat of a tradition for TommyB, Rosemary and I. I did break rank and ordered fried oysters and shrimp instead of steamed and received a moderate razing from TommyB. We had the worst waitress in history this evening. I asked 4 (FOUR!) times for a slice of lemon for my water and never did get it...I ended up taking the one on my dinner plate. We never received any drink refills, Tom wanted another beer but apparently he got the last one in the restaurant. We assume he got the last one because if there were more available to sell I'm sure any waitress would have asked if he would like another one. We were there less than an hour and she was in the bathroom at least five times. That means she either has some kind of gastric issue (and with my luck it's contagious), a Readers Digest hidden in there or all of her tips are going up her nose. Sure hope she has a backup plan on how to support herself because she's going to be living in a van down by the river if she continues as a waitress.
It was beautiful today so I finally got the Christmas lights and "Morty's tree" taken down from the screened porch. Morty is less than pleased and could not understand why I had taken down his bird/squirrel/turtle/heron watching perch. Poor Mort has fallen out of that tree so many times I was debating on getting him one of those buttons you wear around your neck for when YOU HAVE FALLEN AND CAN'T GET UP. I worry about that old lady...hope the paramedics finally arrived and got her back on her feet because best I can figure she has been laying in that hallway about 5 years now. I really would like to have one of those buttons. Oh, I don't need it because I fall down but I sure could use some help getting things off the top shelf or bringing in the half ton of cat food Morty and Ginglebelle go through each week. HEY...help is help and if I pay the fee I will press that button any darned time I feel like pressing a button. Any bets on how quickly my button would be confiscated?

My memory is shot...or is it?

I live in a large condo complex and have intoduced myself to the same couple three times. They are probably convinced that I am either the stupidest person on the face of the earth or recently escaped from a mental institution. I seem to remember the important things like lunch dates and days off but doctors appointments...pfffftbt. Not so much. I never forget to stock up on cat food because it only takes one or two times of waking up with a 15 lb (sorry Gingles, a lady should never tell another ladies weight) cat standing on your chest and four pointy little feet cutting off your oxygen. I also NEVER forget to buy Diet Cherry Coke because, well...apparently I need it to survive and Clamato Juice! I may be out of laundry detergent for two weeks but I always remember to buy Diet Cherry Coke and Clamato Juice. Soooo...do I have memory loss or have I learned the male trait of "selective memory"? Hmmm, I may be onto something, if I can just remember what it was.

LOVE Fridays!

Especially when I have the WHOLE weekend off AND only one more week until vacation! The Christmas decorations are still up so I guess I better deal with chore on Saturday. HEY...it has been colder than a well diggers behind since the day after Christmas but in true South Carolina style it's supposed to be 60 tomorrow. Since Christmas was at Eddie's this year I don't have anything to take down inside and not a lot outside so it shouldn't take long to get it all packed up and put away. The outside storage closet really really needs to be emptied and reorganized but I don't know if I can get to that this weekend or not, probably depends on my nap schedule.

My ears itch, my throat is sore AND I have a headache.

If I get sick less than a week before I go on vacation I will be sooo ticked! Stayed home today and drank enough water to float a boat. Did you know it's possible to nap when you are on the john? Well...you can! Apparently I'm not real bright because everytime I got up to go to the bathroom I drank another glass of water. Guess I really do need to read up on this whole cause and effect thing.

It's COLD!

Yep, I have Goldilocks syndrome. First it was too hot
and now it's too cold. Not only are the temperatures in the 30's but the wind cuts to the bone. Poor ole Ginglebelle made her usual dash to get out the front door until she received a blast of Artic air right to the face and then she stopped so fast I think she left skid marks in the hall. Debi and I went to McAllisters for lunch today and ordered two bowls of chili. One to eat and one to put our feet in to keep warm.

OK, I'm scared.

My Grandma always told me to be careful what you do January 1st because that sets the tone for remainder of the year. We had 200 people for dinner this evening and I swear they were way over their limit for grouchy old people. Most of them were sweet as they could be but boy oh boy the grouchy ones were a tad over the top. One lady yelled at me because she is diabetic and couldn't eat the dessert. "I am so sorry Mam, did you tell your tour planner you are diabetic?" "OH..you didn't?" I found her an apple and a banana and WANTED to say.."Lady, I'm not exactly sure how you expect us to know you are diabetic if you don't tell us but I ain't Miss Cleo and cannot read your mind." I still haven't lost my touch with the geriatric set and managed to maintain my title as the OFFICIAL OLD MAN MAGNET OF MYRTLE BEACH. If there is a man age 80 or above, with polyester pants hiked up to his arm pits, one tuft of white hair sticking straight up, upper OR lower (but never both) dentures and nose hair so thick that it could be braided....STAND BACK! He's mine, all mine. I don't know how they search me out but they do every single time. After work this evening John & Jenn, Tom & Janie, TommyB, Rosemary and I had a wonderful dinner at Umi Pacific. Hopefully our night out is the event that will set the tone for the new year as I cannot think of a better way to begin 2008!